The Chilling Adventures Of ChandraShekhar

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I had come home from the farm after toiling hard in the farm. I hoped to get a good night's sleep, so that I could go harder into work next day. Mr Shamlal, the owner of the farm, promises to give me a raise, if I worked hard.
Just as I was about to sleep, I heard knocking on my door, the door was old and wooden and created a very loud noise. I got up and got hold of my lantern to see who it was.

"Chandu! You have to help me Chandu, She's gone!" It was my friend Ramu, who was hardly breathing.
"Ramu, What do you mean? Who's gone, Ramu?" I tried to bring Ramu's nerves down.
"Radha! Radha's gone, I looked for her everywhere." Ramu finally gave some details.
"Wait, Let me get my stick, We will look for Radha."

It was midnight and carrying a stick was necessary, You never know when you might need to hit Ramu on the head, He gets restless sometimes you know. I went inside and got Basilisk, Basilisk was the name of my stick, I might live in a village but I read Harry Potter.
It was a beautiful night, Me and Ramu walking side by side on the muddy pathways with farms on one side and an oddly large brook on the other. It was dead silent, just the sound of water trickling by the petty rocks was audible but then Ramu decided to ruin everything, He had to take a piss and pissed by the brook, disrupting the trickling sound with a shower of his own. 

"Do you not want to find Radha? You are just pissing away time here. I have to reach early at Mr Shamlal's farm tomorrow." I complained to Ramu.
"Chandu, don't worry I have figured it out." Ramu said while adjusting his pants.
"Then why did you call me out in such hurry?" 
Stupid Ramakant, why was it necessary to call me then, if he knew.
"I realized it just now, When I was taking a piss I remembered that Radha had gone away just like this once before." Ramu was explaining.
"So should I go back, Now that you know where she is?" I asked.
"No Chandu, I need you, precisely I need this."
Ramu said while pointing at my dick, which was weird, I mean why would he need my dick to find Radha, I was not into things like these.
"What are you saying Ramu! Why do you want my thing?!"
"I need your stick stupid, not your dick." Ramu explained.
That made more sense, because my dick was good for nothing anyway.
"Why do you need Basilisk?" I argued.
"I will need to hit her to get her walking, She's a bit lazy." Ramu said.
"You shouldn't hit you cow Ramu."
I advised Ramu, Radha was a loyal cow even though sometimes, she might leave in the dead of night and then her owner would call me out and point at my dick and stuff, She didn't deserve a stick.
"You don't know anything about Cow-herding, don't tell me what to do." Ramu scoffed at me.
"You are a cowherd for fuck's sake, Shouldn't you have a stick yourself." I returned the favor.
"I forgot my stick, just give me yours no." 

Ramu asked politely, But how could I? Basilisk was the stick my father used to hit me with whenever he used to come home drunk, He would hit me on my back several times with the stick until I bled, Clearly I was emotionally attached to the stick. The stick was a essential part of my childhood and also by the way, It was the stick I strangled my father with to kill him, stupid bastard had too much to drink one day. 
"Fine." 
I reluctantly agreed being unable to refuse Ramu, because he was a very good childhood friend and also he helped my hide the body.
"But where do we have to go?" I asked Ramu as we were walking aimlessly, at least I was.
"Mr Shamlal's farm, Radha likes the pasture there." 
Ramu said in a hushed tone, He knew that it was terrible, Mr Shamlal was very possessive about his farm land and never let stray animals in. If he would be standing vigil on his farm then Me, Ramu and Radha would be fucked, quite literally at that. Ramu knew the odds and was prepared for the worst.
"We are not too far from there, I hope Mr. Shamlal's not on the farm."
I wished. I decided to gather my nerves and breathed heavily. The night was so silent that my heavy breath sounded like a breeze and that made Ramu want to piss once again and we stopped once again. We continued once all the piss fest was done and we reached the farm, To our delight that farm was unguarded and we could see Radha standing by the tree enjoying her grass.
It almost looked like a painting with the moon on the background and the light forming a silhouette of Radha eating some greenery.
"Radha!" 
Ramu shouted, Radha looked at him for a moment and got back to eating the grass, It was a disappointing moment for all the Karan Johar fans who wanted to see a running reunion but that did not happen, Instead I saw a shadow of a person behind the tree.
"Ramu don't rush, I think there's someone there." I tried to warn Ramu.
"Yes, stupid dumbfuck that's Radha, you forgot?"
Oblivious to the complete information Ramu was running towards Radha and just as he was about to get hold of Radha, the figurine from the shadow jumped on Ramu from behind and held him a neck lock. It was Mr. Shamlal and he had a big smile on his face.
"You fuckers thought that you can get away with anything, don't try to hide from me Chandu!"
"Dad?"
The words were too familiar, It just slipped out of my mouth but I regained control of my mouth and decided to confront Mr. Shamlal.
"With all due respect sir, That cow is ours, we will take her and leave without causing any havoc here." 
"As if I would let you, that cow is now officially mine." 
Shamlal blurted out, but Ramu could not take it, he held Shamlal's hand and got out of the neck lock and locked him in one of his own, I was running with Basilisk in my hand all the while and with one powerful bottom to top swing, I hit Shamlal in the nuts but in the process I hit Ramu as well and now both of them were lying on ground holding their crotches. 
I helped Ramu up, He picked up a rock and smashed Shamlal's face to bits till it was unrecognizable. Mr. Shamlal was a noisy bitch, he screamed a lot through the process but thankfully, we had all the help luck could offer. The farm was far away from the residents of the village.
"Bury him." I ordered Ramu.
"I did the last one, It's you this time."

He was right though, I picked Mr. Shamlal and put him in a sack and we left for the burying grounds. I dug the grave and put the sack in and completed the burying process, while Ramu was sitting by a fire caressing Radha.
"Well at least I don't have to go to the farm tomorrow."

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